The Blogger NetworkAdvertise with us Report this ad

What's the big deal about Young Living

Directionally Challenged

I have known since childhood that I have a special condition. It is the condition that renders me directionally challenged. In simple English, this means that I can not find my way out of a paper bag with two hands and a flashlight.

I can remember having nightmares as a child of being behind the steering wheel of a car, peering over the top, and barely being able to see out the windshield. But, you know what the scary part was? NOT that I was only seven or eight years old and didn’t know how to drive, but what petrified me was not knowing which way to go!

I still get turned around at church after almost two years. Getting from Bible class to the auditorium for worship, I have a record of about 50% on making a wrong turn.

I’m the type that Googles driving directions, prints them out, and drives with the paper in my hands on the steering wheel. (I turn the paper whenever I make a directional change.)

When the elevator doors open? I look around the elevator for the best candidate to follow because I have no idea which way to go upon stepping out!

That’s why I was a touch nervous when Chevy assigned me the task of using OnStar in the Chevy Malibu to get myself to a destination I had never been to before.

 

Madison and I chose to go to the Dallas World Aquarium which was over an hour away in downtown Dallas. Where there are one way streets! Gulp!

I very nearly printed out a map in usual fashion so I could hold it on the steering wheel. I refrained though, and trusted OnStar.

The verdict? I am in love.

If I weren’t already happily married to a hunka hunka burnin’ love and it wouldn’t be really weird and slightly creepy, I would marry OnStar.

We had only one little hiccup at the end of our journey when my new love led us to a dry cleaners in a strip mall, but I forgave him. I get world aquariums and dry cleaners mixed up sometimes myself, so after a few moments of exasperation (and relief that we weren’t on a schedule and weren’t made to be late) we got back on track and ended up at precisely the place we were aiming for!

I even made it all the way home without getting lost, too!

At the end of our journey, Madison reminded me that I did marry OnStar 25 years ago, but he was at work that day. My husband just happens to be a genius at directions. He always knows which way to go and never leads us down the wrong path.

Now, if I could just convince him to live in my rear view mirror, my life would be perfect.

  • Share This:
  • Share on Facebook
  • Email this Post
  • Share on Twitter

Comments

  1. TOO FUNNY!!! I am TOTALLY with you on being Directionally Challenged. It’s bad, trust me it’s bad! The other day we forgot something and I made one turn onto another road, realized we forgot something, stopped to turn around…. and my 5 yr old girl asked what we were doing… my 8 yr old boys response, oh it’s okay Mom just made another wrong turn!!! You would think he would realize I couldn’t possibly get lost after one simple turn off our road… but well maybe not!

    • Smockity Frocks says:

      @melinda, Sometimes my children will tell me from the back seat, “Uhhhh, Mommy this is the wrong way!” At least SOMEONE knows where we’re going!

  2. oh and yes I too married the OnStar man… it’s sickening. Sometimes I even call him for directions! Okay honey, I’m on this road, and I am looking for this location or this address where should I go….. and he leads me right to it!

  3. I have a girlfriend who call me her “Poor Woman’s OnStar”. She’ll call me up, describe her surroundings and tell me where she’s trying to go, and I’ll talk her out of the boonies (again) and on the way to her original destination.

    One of these days, I think I wanna have me a showdown with OnStar and see who comes out on top. Hmmm…

  4. My husband and I are the opposite. He *always* gets lost. I know where I am and how to get where I’m going, pretty much all the time. When he’s alone, he needs GPS or good directions. When I’m alone, I just get there. Who needs OnStar? But when we’re together we still get lost, because I am submissive. He will insist that we go the wrong way, I meekly suggest that I know where to go, and that ain’t it, but then we go his way anyway. This usually adds at least an hour to any road trip–even when I’m driving and have the control. I don’t know when I’m going to grow enough of a spine to go the right way the first time. Sigh.

  5. Oh, what a relief to know my condition has a name! Now I feel better knowing I’m not alone in my suffering. I print off directions (whoever invented Mapquest, I love you!) even with a GPS in the car, because I’m afraid the GPS might send me to the wrong place (a dry cleaners, perhaps?) and then I won’t know what to do or where to go. My husband can find his way out of anywhere, but I’ve gotten lost in my own town. Go figure. At least now there’s the comfort of knowing someone else is just as lost and confused out there as I am. Maybe one day we’ll run into each other – if you find yourself lost in South Florida and I find myself lost in…where are you again? ;-)

  6. This was HILARIOUS! So fabulous. We just moved to Georgia and I told my husband I NEEDED a GPS. I am a small town girl. I grew up in a town with one main street right down the middle of it. Driving in the city makes me sweat and cry and do all sorts of unusual things. I get lost very quickly. Thank goodness my sweet man heard my cries. I LOVE it. The kids named her Flo. I’m really enjoying your blog. Lots of joy-filled blessings to you and yours!

  7. What’s sad is Connie, I KNOW you and you’re NOT exaggerating! :-)

  8. Driving new places terrifies me. My husband laughed at me once because, before a big interview, I wasn’t the least bit concerned about the actual job interview… I was petrified that I wouldn’t find my way there! He just doesn’t get it. I’ve always figured it was just part of the Y-chromosome. Both he and my dad could have visited a place once, ten years ago, and they still remember right where they’re going. It’s kind of maddening… but I’m always happy to have one of them at the wheel. ;)

  9. Elizabeth says:

    My mother-in-law once went 40 miles out of her way to one town that she had no intention of going to. So now whenever she is late we ask her if she came by way of that town. :) I am not too bad with finding my way but woe betide me if they cut down the big tree, move the red car, and tear down the gas station. :) I am all about visual land marks! Road names? Meaningless details! :)

  10. Oh man! THANK YOU! I am so going to ask my dh to read your post and your readers’ comments so that he’ll stop laughing at me! I just told him the other day that I get a headache whenever I have to drive to a new place by myself!

    I certainly pray that none of my 7 children inherit this gene from me though! :)

  11. I can soooooooooooo totally relate! Driving, walking to and from cars, walking to and from rooms in building. I am the same way! Its funny. Years ago I worked at a mall and parked about the same place every time. I haven’t worked there in years but still park in that area when I go. Also for the last 3 years I probably have gone to the movies 100 times basically in the same 3 theaters. I Still have trouble remembering which way the lobby is after the show is over. I have a million examples like this! I feel stupid and scared at the same times at times!

  12. Hahahaha!!!

    I’m still laughing about “I get dry cleaners and aquariums mixed up sometimes myself.”

  13. You are not alone!!! My children used to say “Mom, would you please stop getting lost!” I got lost in my daughter’s middle school once. I had to get her to take me back to the door leading out. Poor child! Their schools are huge. I would never make it to class on time.

    My husband finally bought me a TomTom. Yahoo has better driving directions than Mapquest. Of course for some reason since we moved in May I actually know which direction is which. It’s weird. 41 years of being lost and suddenly I know my way around.

Trackbacks

  1. [...] when I confessed to you about being directionally challenged? Well, I was just recalling some of my memories from as early as first grade of my little [...]

Leave a Comment

*

What's the big deal about Young Living