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4 Moms Discuss What Happens When Husband Doesn’t Want Any More Babies


I have gotten this question in my inbox several times in one form or another. It usually follows a long story, which summarized sounds like, "I want more children. My husband doesn't. I feel that God wants us to have more children. What should I do?"

Before this point, my philosophy has been, "I'm not touching that one with a ten foot pole." But since this was the assigned topic on our 4 Moms list, here I am with my pole.

First of all, I don't want anyone having more children or not having more children because Smockity said so. I would hope you would make that decision after sticking your nose in between the pages of scripture, praying about it, and consulting with your husband on it.

Let's look at scripture to start with.

"Behold, children are a gift of the Lord,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one’s youth.
How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them;
They will not be ashamed
When they speak with their enemies in the gate. (Psalm 127: 3-5)

God's word makes it clear that children are a blessing and a gift from him.

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. (Ephesians 5:22-23)

God's word also makes it clear that wives are to submit to their husbands.

Now, you can point out that Christians are to submit one to another as the scriptures also state, or you can take the conversation off track by asking, "What about how the husband is supposed to treat the wife?!"

But we are not answering a question a husband has sent in about how he should treat his wife or whether he should submit to her wishes. We are talking here about a wife asking what she should do when her husband says "no more children".

Biologically speaking (or legally speaking in the case of adoption) a wife must have her husband's participation in adding more children to the family. If the husband is unwilling, then the Christian wife's only choice is to submit.

This is not to say that a husband's mind can not be changed through study and prayer. (Some books we read on this subject are The Way Home: Beyond Feminism, Back to Reality [2] and A Full Quiver: Family Planning and the Lordship of Christ [3].)

But until that time comes, if it does, the wife must submit to her husband's decision.

And now, if you dare, go and see what the rest of my 4 Moms team has to say about this topic!

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