Protecting Children From Pedophiles

*Adult topic

Recently, one of my friends posted a link on her Facebook that had me lost for hours reading sinister, horrific details about a sexual predator.

I really didn’t want to continue reading the sick, real-life account of a lady who was married for 40 years to a pedophile, a preacher,  who used his position to gain the trust of families, victimize their children, and steal their innocence.

I wanted to quit reading after each post, but I couldn’t turn away. I couldn’t stop because in each and every post, she gave “red flags” or “off behaviors” that her husband had exhibited over and over that she had talked herself into disregarding. Because she trusted him and wanted to believe the best about him, she didn’t realize he was committing heinous crime after crime right under her nose. His friendly and persuasive personality, and the tendency of others to believe only the best allowed him to get away with it for over 40 years!

But looking back, she could see the signs that she should have noticed something was very, very wrong with her husband. And she lays those signs out for the reader.

One of the things she laments most is not acting on her gut feelings because she wanted to trust her husband. She warns the reader that if something feels “off” in regard to an adult spending extra time or paying extra attention to a child, you should trust that feeling.

It is very difficult reading, but so necessary if we want to see what we should be protecting our children against.

Please, do yourself and your children a favor and read her story. She will show you common characteristics of pedophiles, and enable you to better protect your children from them.

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Comments

  1. Interesting considering in our town right now they are considering letting juvenile sex offenders attend our public schools. We have a facility here, like a rehabilitation center, for juvenile male sex offenders. I homeschool our kids so I don’t need to worry about this particular incident, but I know there are other pedophiles out there to beware of too. Such a sad thing that satan is able to get a hold of these people and cause them to do such damage, not only on the kids they violate, but to their own families such as this wife. So sad.

    • We homeschool as well, but that doesn’t mean that we keep our guards down even among homeschool groups and church friends. I have seen things happen in both groups. Often that is where Satan will like to try and get in – the wheat among the tares. Always be on guard in prayer and discernment. May God have mercy upon our families, protect our children, and give us wisdom and discernment who our children are around.

  2. thank you for sharing her website. Really important information there.

  3. Thank you for sharing this. It is too important to turn away, simply because we want to stop our ears and never hear of it. Women in my family have been similarly hurt, and as a result I have been taught to always be on my guard. Better to hear that without the terrible tragedy that often teaches how to avoid it, than because of it.

  4. Thank you Smockity.

    I read the link you posted and I realized I was reading about my dad. I have no idea if he ever molested any children (my sister and I never were) but his behavior is chillingly similar to that of the pedophile. Growing up, I always knew there was something off about his behavior with other small children. But as a kid myself, I had no idea why I felt that way. All I know is when my parents divorced after 25 years of marriage and I found out it was because of his multiple affairs, as well as a pornography addiction, that I didn’t want him around my kids. My husband and I both made that decision together. My dad tried every manipulative trick in the book, mostly guilt, to try to get me to relent so he could see his grandkids. That was almost 7 years ago. He has not seen them. It’s been one of the hardest choices to make. Especially being a Christian. We are taught to forgive. But I have found that you can forgive without opening yourself up for abuse. You don’t have to prove your forgiveness to the abuser.

    Because of my decision, I lost one whole side of my family. A side that I had often seen. Aunts, uncles, and cousins in abundance. I have no idea what lies my dad has told about my husband’s and my decision to keep our kids from him.

    The harsh reality was, I just didn’t, couldn’t trust my dad.

    So mamas, trust your gut instinct even if it is about a family member. Even if it means ruining a family relationship. Your children are far more important.

    • Elizabeth says:

      This. This is 100% true. My husband and I faced a very similar situation with my mother in law. It’s so disheartening to lose relationships all because of one person’s manipulation and ill-will, but unfortunately necessary in too many cases. And since we have cut ties with this person, we have found out some extremely disturbing things about her. Gut feelings are often right!

    • for my babies says:

      My father raped me as a small child till I was around 11, I later found out he was a convicted pedophile, I didn’t allow him around my children and I was angry that so many people in our family knew, my mom included, my grandma even knew, his wife married him knowing from the first child he raped, I found out he also molested my baby sitter, she was trying to protect me. I have grand babies now and I am happy with our small family, God knows my heart, he has given me strength when everyone failed, and I have the ability to not fall into guilt, but continue to protect those I love, I am sad to say, he walks freely, and I’ve tried to warn everyone who has contact with him but no one believes me

  5. I’m still trying to load the website to read it…. I live in So. California where it seems sex offenders are the norm. I check the Megan’s law website every few weeks just to see if they are moving in and out of my neighborhood. Last year I found out that I had a registered sex offender living next door! I asked my next door neighbor of 10yrs who claimed he had no idea (it was it brother in law that had moved in with them) but he’d check with his wife. I gave him the info and picture that I had printed out. They have 3 kids and did nothing about it, luckily he moved out about 6mos later. Unfortunately there are many out there that don’t get caught and aren’t on the registry. Thanks for the link, I look forward to reading her website if my computer ever loads it. :/

  6. r.e. the “…pedophile who was a preacher who used his position to gain the trust of families, victimize their children, and steal their innocence….”

    I agree 100% this is horribly WRONG and happens way more often
    (even ONE TIME equals TOO Often) than people know, think or admit.
    Just because a man or woman is a “preacher” even pastors a church; DOES NOT mean that person is a CHRISTIAN {True follower of JESUS}. Unfortunately, far too many churches, religious organizations, and parochial schools [again, Even One = far too many] choose their leaders
    based upon religious college/seminary credentials, recommendation of their church hierarchy, and the charismatic personality of a potential leader.
    In My Humble Opinion, the FIRST qualification we should look for in any preacher, youth or children’s minister, scout troop leader, Boys and Girls club leader/helper, daycare worker, etc. is his or her obedience to what JESUS taught as the Greatest Commandments: “Love the Lord your GOD with all your heart, with all your soul, and all your mind… AND “Love your neighbor as {you} love yourself.” Matthew 22:37&39

  7. Thank you for sharing. I have shared this with ministry leaders at my church.

  8. Thank you for sharing! This is a subject that is near to my heart. My mother was married to a pedophile of whom she had known her whole life. Their families had grown up together. He had already abused one of my sisters and had touched me as well. Thankfully, my mom left as soon as she found out. My husband was sexually abused also. We are very vigilant with our children. We refuse to allow them to victimized as we were. In fact, our oldest has done a girl’s group study on human trafficking. I’m heading over to read the post now….

  9. Not a fun read but important. I think controlling tendencies like these in someone point to a hidden sin of some sort – there is a reason someone would try to be so controlling. Not every controlling person is a pedophile but they’re harboring some sort of sin. My heart aches for the destruction satan can effect through these people. May Jesus heal the brokenness.

  10. Thank you so much for sharing this information with your readers. I’m the (ex) “wife of the pedophile” and this has been a horribly difficult thing for me to realize that I lived so long with a man who was “two different people.” Please, please learn from my errors and NEVER let down your guard — ever! Sadly, I didn’t see the many, many “red flags” because I didn’t know what to look for. For the sake of all children, we must continue to educate ourselves on this difficult (and unpleasant) topic, and do all we can to keep our children safe.

  11. for my babies says:

    My father raped me as a small child till I was around 11, I later found out he was a convicted pedophile, I didn’t allow him around my children and I was angry that so many people in our family knew, my mom included, my grandma even knew, his wife married him knowing from the first child he raped, I found out he also molested my baby sitter, she was trying to protect me.and for 30 years she never told anyone, I have grand babies now and I am happy with our small family, God knows my heart, he has given me strength when everyone failed, and I have the ability to not fall into guilt, but continue to protect those I love, I am sad to say, he walks freely, and I’ve tried to warn everyone who has contact with him but no one believes me, he was convicted but was only given probation, he refuses to register, I don’t know how to protect other children from him other than here, I pray that it would stop for the sake of our innocent ones, our children deserve to breathe not to have their breath stolen.

  12. I was sexually, mentally, emotionally and verbally abused by my grandfather as far back as I can remember. He did many terrible things, some of which are too distasteful for me to talk about publicly. I want to share my testimony, because so many people have been hurt, and they need to realize that someone has made it through their struggles so they can have hope. More than anything, I want you to know and really understand that anyone who has been abused can fully recover if they will give their life completely to the Lord…It may seem impossible, but God’s truth has set me free from a life of pretense and lies and has restored my soul. I am living proof that nothing is too hard for God. No matter what you’ve been through or how bad you’ve been hurt, there is hope!
    My book is available at Amazon and I would love for each person who has liked this page to order a copy. Each copy sold will go toward the prevention of child abuse across the country and world. The Little Girl Inside. God Bless, Diane Waltman

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